Roadhog is my Mofo

It’s safe to say that I have been getting into Overwatch lately, and as that is the case, it makes sense for me to write about that as my first blog post for 16Miles2Hell Blogs. So there he is, in all his glory, just to the left over there. Isn’t he awesome? A big fat guy with a gas mask, flack cannon, and a hook. It’s like Blizzard stepped into my head and said, ‘yeah, let’s make this fucker just for Thraz.’

Oh, if you don’t know, my common gamer handle/name/tag is Thrazghul. If you see it, that’s probably me.

I was psyched about Overwatch from the moment it was announced a few years back, and though even though I played in the beta a bit, I didn’t pick up the game until recently. This has nothing to do with a lack of enthusiasm, mainly a lack of funding. We all speculated Overwatch would be free-to-play to start, doing the hero purchasing thing that is so popular in MOBAs like Heroes of the Storm. But Blizzard went another way and made Overwatch a big game – a fucking big game – and charged the regular price for it. They were right to do it, of course. Overwatch is a smash hit, and while it worked out well for them, it did delay me getting into the game for quite some time.

When you have as many kids as I do, money for new games doesn’t come up all that often. So here’s a word out there developer peoples – we’ll accept copies of games for reviews!

I am a lore guy. I love the lore of video games, the back stories, the character motivations and all that cool shit that so many people consider secondary. In many cases, that is what sells the game for me. I know more about the history of Azeroth than I do our own world, and while I couldn’t tell you what possessed Andrew Jackson to lead a campaign of tyranny against the Native Americans, I can tell you about the deepest hurts and fears of Blanka from Street Fighter. Does that make me stupid? No, just a product of the American Education system during a time when pop culture was way more entertaining.

I am not a hipster. Go fuck yourself.

Breaking with tradition, I don’t know much about Overwatch, however. I know that it’s in our future, one of the few Blizzard games that actually uses the Earth we’ve all come to know and love as its starting point. I know there were some bad robots called Omnics that started some shit, and some dudes called Overwatch that stopped them… and then turned into a bunch of dicks about the entire situation. I know that Overwatch-the-Game happens a couple of decades after Overwatch-the-Group disbanded. Beyond that, I know a few things about individual characters and that’s about it.

So basically, I know shit.

Roadhog is a bad guy. Along with his partner, Junkrat, they manage to burgle and kaboom and sew chaos and disharmony on the insanely bright and colorful world of Overwatch-the-Setting. That’s fine with me, I don’t mind playing the bad guy, especially when that bad guy has a flaming pig tattooed to his massive gut. Everything about Roadhog just screams attitude, and as Tank character, his playstyle fits in directly with how I like to play games. I don’t need to do a lot of damage, but I need to be able to take a hit and do something cool.

That’s something that Roadhog does to the extreme. Aside from running around with what is essentially a futuristic shotgun, he also has a little doodad his sticks to his chest for a self-heal. This, along with his high health, gives him an insane amount of durability in the field. While other tanks like Reinhardt and Winston rely on shields, Roadhog fucking takes it. He lets the bullets bouncy of his flabby thighs, and when it gets too much, he hits the joy-box and keeps going. The cool thing about this playstyle is that it teaches you to rely on terrain. By ducking and weaving in and out as you launch an assault against the enemy, it gives you a few vital second to hit the heal when your health gets low. Then you’re right back in the game, doing what this badass does best.

What ‘hooked’ me about Roadhog, however, is his other standard ability, a Scorpion-like harpoon attack that drags the enemy right up and close. Your shot gun has two settings; first, it can fire a long-range spread that does meh damage. Secondly, it can fire a short-range spread that can tear someone fucking face off. You hook ’em, drag ’em in, and let the pellets fly out of your flack cannon. It’s so rewarding to tear healers like Mercy apart with this attack, but absolutely the most rewarding thing is to pull a jet-packing Pharah out of the air and blow her to pieces.

There is just no better feeling.

I could go on for some time about playing Roadhog, more on his mechanics, and probably do some research into his back story and motivation, but it just doesn’t matter to me so much. He’s fun, he’s my man. He’s my mother-fucking mofo. I love the guy, and I geek out over just getting to play him. I’ve long since decided my next tattoo is going to be the Horde symbol (in my own style) on my left arm, and I think below that I am going to get my favorite Blizzard characters from the different franchises underneath it, with Roadhog front and center.

Characters need attitude, and there is nothing about Roadhog that does speak to that end.

So who are you playing in Overwatch and why? Hit me up on the comments below, and tell me why your character is the shit.

2 thoughts on “Roadhog is my Mofo”

  1. I’d have to agree with this as a whole, ive been using Roadhog and Junkrat more and more in recent matches. Especially in 3V3. He’s awesome, i just have to practice with the hook more.

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